Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Pope Benedict XVI is Count Chocula


Yesterday, while enjoying my morning coffee and perusing my daily dose of fashion, news, and gossip, I came across an image that shall haunt me for the rest of my days:


And then I realized: Pope Benedict XVI truly is Count Chocula. Let me offer you my evidence:

Frightening, isn't it?

Now, I want to take a minute to defending myself. Believe it or not, I actually grew up in the Catholic church. I was even an alter boy for several years (surprise surprise, I know). I actively participated in the Catholic church until I realized two things: 1. there really was no place for me in the Catholic church and 2. Religion and "faith" are comfort mechanisms for the boring to rationalize their existence.

Now, when I say there is no place for me in the Catholic church, I say this because the Catholic church spent the majority of its history burning people like me at the stake. Even in modern times the Catholic church proclaims that they accept "homosexuals" (which is, by the way, a derogatory term) as long as they never act on their homosexual impulses. This is kind of like telling a chair that they can be a chair, as long as they don't let anyone sit on them. Huh... actually that metaphor works on more levels than I anticipated! Oh, sure, there are some forms of organized faith or religion that do accept da gays, but that leads me to my second point.

Religion and "faith" are comfort mechanisms for the boring to rationalize their existence. Seems inflammatory, I know, but I can't help myself! Now, I wouldn't categorize myself as an atheist, but that is just because I don't like to categorize myself in general. Personally, I think it's arrogant for anyone, religious or not, to assume they can explain our existence and exactly what will happen to us when we die. So this is my fundamental problem with both religion AND atheism.

I don't know who we are, I don't know what we are, I don't know where we're going, and I don't know what happens when we die. I actually find this lack of knowledge to be very fulfilling. If I had the answer to all these questions, then what would be my motivation to try to acquire new knowledge?

Anyway, back to my main thesis: Pope Benedict XVI is Count Chocula.
Pope Benedict creeps me out. I'm sorry, but I can't help myself! As I said, I grew up in the Catholic church with the head of the church being Pope John Paul II.
Doesn't he just look like someone who should be your grandfather? He looks like the nicest man in the world. So he passed away, as people tend to do, and the Catholic church chose to replace him with this?:
Gee, that'll help improve your image!

3 comments:

  1. I think we need more chair metaphors!

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  2. and Pope JP2 kind of looks like George W.

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  3. Love. This. Post.

    That is all.

    ReplyDelete